Wednesday, October 11, 2006
tears have ran out! i officially announce: "i failed GP!" omg... thus, meaning im in the danger of RETAINING!however, everyone around me been telling nt to worry. sure can promote de!im praying super hard now though!how i wish ms lee will enter cls tml n says tt there's a moderation.or rather kind her really kept her promise n help me get the additional "1" more mark!!i really dun wish to retain for tt dumb 1 mark la!!! super irritating...
Anwz, for wadever reasons which im still pondering on, my results have slacken tremendously...GP from C to U, maths from B to C... wads wrong with me??according to my mum, she said i changed a lot since j1esp my ATTITUDE!!She thinks i v zi yi wei shi!! Haiz... guess so ba...i do feel the change in myself... i know i have change n was for the worst...the nightmare did start in term 3... this evil soul jud silently creep in n changed my life!im actualli sort of dislike my current self too!been trying to turn back to the olden daysbut would side-track once in a while...cant i jus have some determination??i really wonder where did the previous VIVIAN go! not tt i hate myself now, but i feel more comfortable with the previous me...mayb the decision for a change was wrong right from the start... trying to voice urself, to attain a higher EQ dun apply to everyone.In fact, it had caused me to become v "dao", like who i was in my ij days...ij wasnt a gd memory, i dont wish history to repeat itself...MAY MY DETERMINATION DRIVE ME TOWARDS MY GOAL!!!
worse of all, i seem to be cursed by the digit "9".act i oreadi had a bad omen dis morning when i suddenly had a tot tt i got marks ending with "9" for all papers.it did came true... my overall promo results (MY + EOY), all ended with 9, meaning only 1 mark to the next grade...who in the world can be so unlucky??ms/mr 9, stop playing tricks on me!!also, there's a no. of sect for each paper...i can do extremely well (they did shocked me!) for the front sect n fail the last sect!wads wrong??is it so hard for me to have an A...or does A jus simply hates me n refuse to befriend me...dis is esp so for chem!! MY n EOY both 69must as well go bang wall...
jus realised tt maybe my grades are signalling for me to WAKE UP!!! say BB n CU to the nuisance cum full of nonsense me!! haha, tts the only way to cheer myself up...found out tt consistency doesn't work on me... Last min chionging for papers the nxt day surprising produce better results. wad logic is tt??also, have to note tt too much confidence can kill too!! my self-believe b4 promos had far exceeded the required amt!I have really took things for GRANTED!!!
NOW I KNOW THE FEELING OF FALLING AT THE VERY LAST STEP TOWARDS THE PEAK! IT'S A PAINFUL EXPERIENCE N MAY EVEN KILL!! T_T
Vivian imagined this on 20:07
